The days and weeks leading up to Marshall's delivery seemed to last forever. After the false alarm incident, I set my focus on my induction date of Thursday, July 23rd. I was put on the schedule, and instructed to call early that morning to confirm there was a bed for me. Unfortunately, Wednesday night, they called to say they had to bump me to Monday. Needless to say, I was disappointed. When Monday morning rolled around, I called again, and again was told they were too busy to take me. I was put on the schedule for Tuesday morning. At this point, I'm sure you can understand, I wasn't putting much faith in it actually happening Tuesday morning either. In some ways, what was the point? I would be 39+5 weeks for the induction. Might as well be full term! Thankfully, Marshall decided enough was enough, and took matters into his own hands. :)
July 28, 2015
Early Tuesday morning, at about 1:30AM, I woke up. I noticed my lower back cramping up a bit, but thought it might be related to my position, so tried turning onto my other side. The cramping didn't stop, and I noticed that I seemed to be contracting every time that wave of cramping came and went. I started timing my contractions, while googling on my phone "signs of real labor" and "when to call the doctor". Justin woke up because of the light from my phone. I told him I thought I might be in labor. I decided to take a quick shower just in case this was the real thing. The contractions became strong enough that I could no longer walk or talk through them, so I went ahead and called the doctor at 2:45AM. Justin got up and took a shower while I spoke with the doctor, who advised me to go ahead in to labor and delivery.
Justin's dad came over to babysit Owen, while we headed to the hospital...again. The contractions became stronger and stronger on our way to the hospital, but not terribly painful. I was in my gown and sitting in the hospital bed by 4:00AM. The nurse checked me for the first time at 4:14AM, and to my surprise, said I was already 7cm. I looked at Justin and said, "Thank God we came to the hospital when we did!" I asked for my epidural, but the nurse explained to me that I first needed an IV, and a certain amount of fluid in before I could get one. She also said that I needed my doctor to order the epidural- and that apparently he wasn't here yet. Needless to say, this made me slightly anxious. But they assured me that by the time the fluid I needed was in, my doctor would likely be here and could order my epidural.
With every passing minute, it seemed my contractions intensified. At one point, I was yelling to Justin that I felt like I had to push. With no nurse in the room, he went out to find someone and when he didn't immediately see anyone in the halls, he pushed the emergency button. With that, there were at least 4 nurses in the room! I told them with no uncertainty that my contractions were horribly painful and that I kept feeling the need to push. I began crying out with each contraction- which I was horribly embarrassed about! I really cannot even begin to describe how they felt. But I knew that as each one came, I had absolutely no control over my body. I begged for the epidural again, and thankfully was told a different OB was willing to write the order since my doctor had still not arrived.
When the anesthesiologist walked in, I felt a genuine rush of relief. My savior had arrived! I scribbled my signature on the consent, and then repositioned myself on the edge of the bed. The nurses and doctor instructed me to lean forward, hug the pillow, and hold completely still so that he could insert the needle. I somewhat frantically told them I was going to try my best, but that I truly believed if a contraction came, I would not be able to hold still. The doctor stressed to me the importance of my holding still, but I simply knew it was not going to be possible. And just like that, the next contraction came. I unintentionally threw my body backward, and started screaming, "I'm pushing!!!" I didn't mean to be pushing, my body just was! The nurse checked me and said, "she's complete". Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the anesthesiologist leaving the room which had me truly begin to panic. In that moment, I realized two things... #1 my doctor would likely not be present for my delivery, and #2 I was going to be delivering naturally without any pain medication.
Now please understand that delivering naturally was NEVER, EVER, EVER something that I would have chosen to do. I had no interest in wearing that badge of honor that apparently comes with delivering naturally. My stance has always been that if child birth can be made even remotely less uncomfortable, and therefore perhaps even enjoyable(?) then that is the experience I would choose. I don't need to scream my head off and feel like I'm being ripped to shreds to feel like I had a "real" birth experience. Unfortunately, what I wanted went out the door with the anesthesiologist. Justin had been waiting in the hallway for the epidural, but upon hearing me scream, "He's coming! He's coming!", he came back in the room. He passed the anesthesiologist, whose explanation was simply, "Too late."
I have no idea what time it was when that happened. All I know is that I felt like I was being murdered... I'm not kidding. Perhaps all you natural delivery moms out there will read this and think I am a big baby- I don't care! I didn't prep for this. I didn't want this. And to me it seriously felt like torture. I had people telling me to move, but I couldn't move. People telling me to breathe, but I couldn't breathe. I had my eyes closed when Justin said, "Mere, Dr. Krell is here" so I didn't believe him. When I did open my eyes and see him, I didn't know if I wanted to kiss him for showing up or kill him for taking so long. I'll give him this much, he definitely brought a sense of calm to the room. I'm sure all the nurses weren't necessarily looking forward to delivering a baby without a doctor present either. Despite my shrieking like a crazy person, he very calmly told me, "Alright, Meredith, the heads right there. A couple of pushes and he'll come right out." And he was right. I think I pushed 3 times, and Marshall Gordon Hunt was born. They placed him on my chest immediately- an experience I didn't get at Owen's delivery due to him being rushed to the warmer for NICU to assess. With Marshall in my arms, I had such a mix of emotions and so many thoughts running through my head. My main thought being, "Did that seriously just happen?!" I mean, seriously... I woke up at 1:30AM and at 4:53AM was holding my very large, 9 pound, 5 ounce baby after delivering without an epidural. Unreal.
I apologized to everyone in the room and expressed my embarrassment over all my screaming. I barely made a peep at Owen's delivery, and could not get over how much screaming I did at Marshall's! I'm sure the people in the surrounding rooms and down the hall really enjoyed hearing that in the wee hours of the morning. :/
We were moved from the labor room into our postpartum room shortly after 7:00AM. You would think that after being up in the middle of the night, and going through the delivery, we'd have been completely exhausted. I know Justin was definitely tired. But for me, the adrenaline rush kept me wide awake, staring at this new member of our family.
Despite a birth experience I would NEVER have asked for -and still wouldn't- the end result had me holding our little Marshall man. And for that I am sincerely grateful. The Lord is good.
"Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift"
-2 Corinthians 9:15
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